There are many situations in life that cause pain, depression or sadness. At some point, we all go through periods of mourning as a result of a breakup or the loss of a loved one. Whatever the cause, we recommend that you read this article further to discover the 5 stages of suffering and ways to overcome them.
The 5 stages of suffering
When you go through a very difficult and painful situation, you probably go through the following steps:
You can’t believe something like this is happening to you. You think it’s a bad dream, that you will wake up and everything will end. In this first stage, skepticism and denial go hand in hand.
2. Finding a culprit
At this stage, you condemn him or you have a feeling of anger towards the one considered “guilty” for the situation you are in. If you do not pass this stage, it can take years in which you accumulate in your soul resentments and hatred that affect your health. In addition, your emotional wounds may never heal.
Of the 5 stages of suffering, the third is sometimes characterized by the strongest feelings. Now you are aware of the significance of the loss suffered. Crying, insomnia and changes in appetite are common signs of depression.
When you realize that there is nothing you can do to regain what you have lost or to repair the relationship, feelings of anger and frustration tempt you. You can even annoy people who have no direct connection with the situation.
For your health and well-being, you must try to reach the last of the 5 stages of suffering as soon as possible. Accepting the loss suffered, adapting to the new situation and healing the wounds of the soul are part of a process that some people complete more easily and others more difficult.
Tips for overcoming suffering
In general, the situations that cause the most suffering are death and separation. Mourning is felt when you suffer a very significant loss.
Even if the new absence is painful, you have to get up and move on for the good of yourself and those around you. Otherwise, the suffering becomes pathological and difficult to treat.
Deep pain, lack of zest for life, suicidal thoughts or exacerbated emotions are symptoms that must be treated by a specialist through therapy.
If you are experiencing the loss of a loved one, consider the following recommendations:
1. Cry as much as you feel the need
It is true that we were told as children that “weeping is a sign of weakness.” But when it comes to deep suffering, crying is a great way to free yourself from sadness and frustration. That way, your physical, mental and emotional health will only benefit.
Of course, this does not mean that you have to cry non-stop, but that tears cleanse your soul. It is important to allow yourself to feel the pain and not be ashamed to cry. In short, crying helps you overcome the 5 stages of suffering.
2. Give yourself time and space
The 5 stages of suffering can last for days, weeks, months or even years. Duration depends on a multitude of factors, including your personality, the relationship between you and the person, how you deal with life’s problems and how you overcome such difficulties.
Leaving all these aspects aside, don’t be too harsh with yourself. Yes, you need to heal, but you do not have to hurry. Do not participate in any race.
3. Ask for help
If you go through a breakup, find a shoulder to cry on. Turn to friends, siblings or parents. If you have lost a family member, rely on the support of your life partner or children. It is important to have someone to listen to you, to give you good advice or simply to be by your side.
You can also go to a psychotherapist or join a support group. Most likely, you will be amazed to find out how many people go through the same situation as you. Often, it is more effective to express your emotions in front of a stranger than in the presence of acquaintances.
4. Express your emotions
In addition to looking for the company of someone to make you feel loved and protected, it is important to talk about how you feel. It doesn’t matter if you talk to your own reflection in the mirror or write in a diary. No matter how little, it matters.
After you express your emotions, you have a feeling of release, you feel that you have taken a stone from your heart and you see more clearly what you have to do. Don’t hold on to what you feel. All these repressed emotions can turn against you.
5. Take care of yourself
When you suffer, you may neglect daily tasks or even your own appearance. But no matter how bad you feel, you need to hydrate, eat, rest and wash. Otherwise, you will not be able to heal emotionally and spiritually.
First of all, take care of your body. Take a shower, comb your hair, change your clothes, put on a little make-up. Get out of the house and breathe some fresh air, have a tea or serve a portion of soup.
Finally, do everything you can to continue seeing your life. Even if it seems hard, even if you feel your heart is broken and even if nothing makes sense… go on. Little by little, your wounds will heal.