Sometimes love is simply not enough for a relationship to work. But other times, the situation is much worse: you can live in a toxic relationship, which will bring you a lot of jealousy and mistrust, but not happiness.
You’d say it’s not hard at all to figure out if you’re in a toxic relationship or not, but unfortunately things aren’t really like that. For this reason, many people end up in such relationships without even realizing it. When you are in love, your cognitive abilities are somewhat disturbed and life seems much pinker than it actually is.
But you still have to open your eyes wide and face reality as it is. In this article, we will show you the most obvious signs that you are in a toxic relationship. Read on and you won’t regret it!
How do I know if I’m in a toxic relationship?
1. Only encounter walls where there used to be doors
Most likely, before you entered into a relationship, you were a very independent woman. You made all the decisions about your work and your free time on your own. You had your own friends, went out with colleagues and established your daily routine to your liking.
But since this relationship began, your life has changed radically:
- You can’t make any decisions without your partner’s consent. For example, you say you have to go to a business dinner or you want to go shopping with a friend. Your partner forbids you to do this as if he were your master.
- Your life, from morning to evening, is closely controlled by your partner. Clear signs that you are in a toxic relationship are, for example, when you need to change your clothes to please him. You start to give up things and habits that you used to like (makeup, furniture, parties, etc.) for his sake.
- You want to advance in life or in your career, but your partner keeps putting obstacles in your way.
- Every day, you feel as if an invisible fence is being built around you.
2. Your feelings are ignored, attacked or manipulated
When we start a new relationship, most of us are very excited. The love we feel is intense and sincere. No wonder we want to dedicate our body and soul to our new partner.
But don’t forget that it is very important to strike a balance between the new relationship and the care that is normal for you. Note the following:
- A cornerstone of any toxic relationship is emotional manipulation. This often manifests itself in subtle but destructive ways.
- Toxic people always seek to meet only their own needs, and they often have low self-esteem and weak personalities. Their insecurity makes them distrustful and urges them to try to control their partners. They are probably afraid of being abandoned in some way, which makes them very jealous.
- The need to be in control makes them become true tyrants, wanting only them to make decisions in the relationship. If you are with such a man and you do not do what he tells you, he will always find a way to put himself in the position of a victim and make you feel guilty.
3. You are more and more unhappy with each passing day
When you are in a toxic relationship, even though you still think you love your partner, you only manage to feel truly relaxed when he is away from you. Look closely at other couples living together in harmony, where both partners respect each other, and remember.
Analyze your feelings well. If you do not feel really happy and notice any of the signs I described above, then it means that you have already started to be someone who is not in reality. You probably already have a lot of low self-esteem and you feel crushed. You need to consider all of these factors.
Often, the emotional distress you feel can turn into physical symptoms. Anxiety and fear can cause, for example, headaches, pain, nausea, etc. Doctors will not be able to help you either, because the real cause of your problems is the depression caused by your unhappy situation.
How can I get out of a toxic relationship?
It may be hard to believe, but statistics show that a toxic relationship can last for years. But why? Here are some worrying reasons:
- Many women are afraid of the possible consequences if they leave their partner, imagining that, for example, they will lose their children or be assaulted by their husbands.
- Many of us simply can’t imagine how we could live “alone.” In a way, I feel that a toxic relationship is better than nothing.
- Often the partners are still in love with each other. Although this love is an unhealthy one that hurts, they actually do not imagine how they could end the relationship.
In order to escape from a toxic relationship, the first thing you need to do is realize that there is a problem. That the situation is not rosy and you are unhappy. Your friends and family may have already noticed what’s going on, so feel free to turn to them for support.
The next step is to talk to your partner. Tell him how you feel, explain your frustrations and dissatisfaction. If these confessions do not make him try to make a change, then it is time to say goodbye.
Your integrity and emotional health must come first, so don’t hesitate to follow your instincts!